Tuesday, March 07, 2006

Ian - it's pure dross

Which of these is the most believable historical figure?

1) Ian the Magnificent, who conquered Wallachia and Rumelia with an army of fifteen thousand janissaries before returning back to Istanbul and his harem of three hundred sumptious, if neglected, beauties.

2) Ian Earp, impeccably dressed rootin'-tootin' hard-drinkin' womanisin' sharpshooter who ended the Clantons' reign of terror at the OK Corral and then rode off into the sunset with Jane Russell.

3) Sir Ian de Cherbourg, Norman Knight who sacked Tyre in the Second Crusade and later became King of Jerusalem and Bishop of Bath and Wells.

4) Ian VIII McSwegan, known as the Unpalatable, who ruled Falkirk and East Renfrewshire with a rod of iron before being accidentally disembowelled on the eve of a climactic showdown battle with his hated foe, Archie Throatslash McClintock, Tyrant-Laird of Kippielaw and Dalhousie.


Anonymous ian 3001 said...

Saint Ian, who brought Christianity to the ancient county of Runcorn during the 5th century AD. Now best known as the patron saint of roundabouts

10:54 am  
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